About the Hungarian society

As almost every society, traditionally the Hungarian was a familiy-centered society too. However, while in the United States and in other European countries the family is becoming less and less important, the Hungarians still view it as one of the most basic things in one’s life.

It is said that the Hungarians have a traditional approach to family, and though in the recent times a change can be noticed, this change hasn’t affected the roots of the social structure yet. What does the „traditional approach” mean? Children live with their parents for a long time, sometimes even in their late 20s (but another reason for this, of course, is the financial situation). The family relations and relationships within the kinship are usually quite strong – for example, I grow up in a very large family, and despite the fact that my extended family members aren’t present in my everyday life, they help me without any words when I am in need, and once or twice in every year we have a „family meeting”, where 20, 30, 40 family members gather. This family-orientation is visible in the situation when you meet your acquaintance after a long time – usually the third or the fourth question is „and how is everbody?” (meaning the family members) or „and how is your family?” We consider it polite to ask about the family.
 

In accordance with this, the elders and the parents traditionally have great respect. „You shall respect your father and mother, and you will have a long life” – says the proverb. Again, there are changes in this mentality, but the children are still taught that they should give their seats to the elders on the public transport, that they have to help the old ladies with heavy bags and that they shall give way to them at the door. And there is even a different, more polite speech level used when speaking to elder people. Furthermore, in the past children used the formal speech to their parents and sometimes – when the age gap was significant – even to their elder siblings.

On the other hand, in some social questions the Hungarian society could be seen as rather liberal and open-minded, such as regard the LMBT society and religious matters. The fact is that the Hungarians neither liberal nor understanding on these topics – but we consider them private matters, and private matters are kind of „holy things” for a Hungarian, with which one can interfere under no circumstances. But, in return, the Hungarians expect from everybody to behave according to this rule – „it is a private matter, so keep it to yourself”.

Marriage and the institution of marriage is another big question regarding the society. It is true that more divorces take place and there are more people who are living as unmarried partners instead of spouses, but I would say that marriage is slowly becoming another „private matter” too – one can believe in its holiness or not, it is up to him/her.

by Alla